Thursday, March 24, 2005

Sighz.. My things are spoilt...

sigh... I guess I was having a too good day yesterday. Had such a great time with my boyfriend the night before. And had such a loving time in the morning where the both of us don't wanna let each other go. He had an appointment with his friends to play badminton in another Monash Campus (Clayton) while I had to be in school the whole day to do my assignments. Had 2 assigment meetings yesterday. One started from 2pm till almost 6pm. Another meeting from 6 to 8pm. Dear did this work in the library while waiting for me.

We had plans to return our overdued DVDs and to later return and have some quality time. But these were all gone when his laptop suddenly cannot access to the Internet. The problem is not known. He thought it was the router's problem. But then it was not because my laptop could access the Internet. He even reset the router trying to rectify the problem. But to no avail. Then he decided to go back to uni to test his laptop. Here, I went to the DVD rental shop alone to return the DVDs, after which went to the supermarket to buy some chicken nuggets which he wanted to eat then went to loko for him back at the cafe near uni.

His laptop was working perfectly when he was in uni. We went home again trying to solve what's wrong with his laptop. I tried to calm him down not to be too angry and frustrated. Try to think of some solutions, try to think what went wrong. But all these were pushed aside by him not realising that he had push all these aside. Then I was accused of not trying to comfort him. Beared all his scoldings, do whatever he wants me to do. I even cooked the nuggets for him. Hope it would at least cheer him up a little. But no...

To a point where I couldn't take it, I went to "sleep" in the living room. Watch a little TV then he pulled me up to "sleep". Of course I couldn't sleep. I want to be there for him and support him. But I get the scoldings again, and got accused of being the cause of the problem. Of course naturally, I went to the living room again to cool off. I was like a volcano about to errupt anytime. But I know I cannot errupt. He could vent all his frustration all he want. But blaming me for being the cause of it? Sighz...

I am really heart broken, sad, confuse, not knowing what he wants. All I want is him and to be there for him and support him and for him to be happy. But I always fail. I'm such a lousy girlfriend. What more can I do? My thumb drive is spoilt. I cannot fix his spoilt mouse. I'm so useless.

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